The Prodigal Father

I began an active search for my father today. Well, that is, if you consider an internet people search to be proactive. I certainly do. I have precious little to go on; only his name and that he lived in New Orleans in 1963. Boy, that really narrows it down!

Larry Wilkerson. That'’s almost all I know of my biological father. Actually, I know a few other things; he was a short order cook, lived in Baton Rouge as well as New Orleans, liked to sing with the band but was not WITH the band; he was just another drunk in the crowd making an ass of himself.

I have a picture of him. If I cover his long chin with one finger, and his big, long forehead with the other, it'’s like looking in a mirror. I have noticed that I am needing to cover up less of his forehead lately. I can'’t say for sure, but I believe that his eyes were all I got from him. My mother is a highly intelligent woman, though she hides it well and I believe the genius-level IQ came from her people. They were simple country farmers, but they were well educated.

This afternoon I called about twenty people. I spoke to many of them and left several messages, none of which have been returned at this point. One guy cursed and slammed the phone down; knowing my luck, that was the guy. Oddly, most of them seemed genuinely interested and one lady even gave me a short-but-not-short-enough history of her husband's family, which she seemed to be quite the expert on.

I have no idea what will happen when I find him. I haven't scripted questions, or really even thought about that much, I just know that I need to find him, and I will, sooner or later. My one hope is that when I do, he's more than a cold granite marker.

Call it closure if you like.


-b

What's More to Say?

More than anything else, the purpose of this blog is to give me an outlet to vent my frustration with everyday life. I began blogging about six weeks ago. I started the Heart Of The Darkness blog as a journal of my recovery from childhood abuse and incest. In that short time, I have found that blogging is great therapy, and I have "met" some good people. I have also found myself many times wanting to write about things other than my recovery process, but have not, in an effort to keep the blog focused. So, here we are with more to say about nothing...


-b